Goodbye, Silky, I Love You So Much
Today I said goodbye to my best four-legged friend Silky. She was a chocolate cocker spaniel who had gone through many medical problems like a champ, but just couldn’t fight off this latest illness.
Almost 14 years ago we lost our male cocker spaniel very suddenly. He was our second cocker and this time I wanted a chocolate female instead of a black male.
We got her when she was but five weeks old, although the breeder told us she was six weeks old.
She was the most kind dog we have ever owned. She actually owned our hearts. She stayed beside me all day and all night and slept beside my bed at night.
Three and a half years ago she was diagnosed with anal gland cancer, a very aggressive form of cancer.
We took her to the veterinary teaching hospital to have her treated and rented a corporate apartment so she could come home every day after her radiation and/or chemo treatments.
For two years we took her back for check-ups and she was declared in remission.
A month or so ago she became ill with a mystery illness. After a week of hospitalization she came home and was doing fine. She had her last check-up last Wednesday and had regained all the weight she had lost when she was sick.
Last night she seemed restless but was still eating well. I noticed it sounded like her foot was flapping when she walked, but I had heard that sound before. Unfortunately, it was when she got sick the last time.
Today I heard her in the next room, panting very hard. I heard her bump into something twice and still heard the panting.
I called my husband and went to the room where she was, only to find her just standing with her head down, shivering and panting.
I wasn’t ready to go anywhere so I called the vet’s office to see if our vet could see her and my husband carried Silky in to me to say goodbye just in case. Her eyes were spaced-out.
After the exam I spoke to the doctor and my husband had told me she couldn’t even stand by then. We found out her temperature was 107 and 101 is normal. A neurological problem such as a brain tumor was suspected.
Euthanasia was recommended. I asked for a clipping of fur from her leg as that was the longest hair on her body.
She was given a sedative and my husband said she was already asleep when she was brought back to the room. He held her as her leg was shaved and as soon as the blood went back into the needle she had quietly slipped away. He kissed her goodbye and we both knew we had done the right thing for this wonderful pet who had loved us unconditionally.
Now we deal with the hurt and grief of losing such a fine pet who got into our hearts the way only she could.
I’ll be away from the blog for a couple of days. Sue will do her usual fine job. I wish to thank Sue and Guss for their posts.
If dogs go to heaven Silky is there with the other pets we loved just as much and will be waiting for me when I cross the chilly Jordan.
Sue adds I am bumping this post back to the top as it was late yesterday when J entered it. J is doing okay today, just missing her wonderful companion. You and hubby are in my thoughts.
Welcome Anchoress Readers.
Written by ~J~
The Anchoress » Blog Archive » All dogs go to heaven Says:
September 28th, 2007 at 10:30 pmVisit The Anchoress » Blog Archive » All dogs go to heaven
[...] convinced of it. But losing a beloved pet is never easy. Jeanette has lost her good friend Silky. If you understand what it’s like, please drop by and commiserate. by TheAnchoress @ [...]
Sister Toldjah Says:
September 28th, 2007 at 11:12 pmVisit Sister Toldjah
Jeanette, I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of your dog. Losing a pet is one of the most painful things we go through, because they wrap their cut little paws around our hearts and become part of the family.
Sister Toldjah Says:
September 28th, 2007 at 11:14 pmVisit Sister Toldjah
Be well, and know you are in the thoughts and prayers of many people.
Autumn Says:
September 28th, 2007 at 11:24 pmVisit Autumn
Jeanette, I am so very sorry; been there, done that, hated it. We lost our 17 year old blonde cocker spaniel last August, he had a sarcoma, a cancerous tumor of the soft tissue on his hind leg. My daughter was 7 years old when we brought Max home, and she is now 24, married and a mother. I can’t think of my children growing up without that happy little dog someplace in the memory. My children never came home to an empty house. There was alway some furry critter that thought the children hung the moon and the stars waiting for them at the door. Both of my now adult children have dogs and can’t imagine life without a dog as a member of the household. What a gift they are, and a sign of God’s love. Maxwell Puppy Dog will be waiting for us on the other side when our turn comes, I am certain of it. A creature that gives such constant love can’t be anyplace else. I have another dog, a 6 year old collie-shepherd mix; Mr. Bear has been my consolation.
~J~ Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 1:00 amVisit ~J~
Thank you all for the kind words, and when she comes back (her ashes) she will be placed on the dresser in my bedroom, along with her fur clipping and her AKC papers.
She’ll go into the ground with me when my time comes, but at the foot of the casket.
It’s hard seeing reminders of her. My husband and I just spent 2 hours reminiscing about her. She’s waiting at Rainbow Bridge with all the other pets we’ve had and it will be a joyous reunion indeed when we see them all again.
We still have one dog and a cat and have just acquired two guinea pigs for the grandchildren to enjoy.
rkb Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 7:46 amVisit rkb
So sorry to hear of your loss. These wonderful creatures add immeasurably to our lives and, I like to think, we add to theirs as well.
As a very low volume breeder, I’ve helped to whelp and raised show champions in a related breed and dogs with performance titles in obedience, agility and tracking. But the very best championship any puppy I’ve raised has ever earned is as Champion Companion, Friend, Comforter, and Clown. That’s what my dogs are to me, first and foremost.
Watching my small pack mourn the loss of a member and then greet joyfully new pups, I’ve learned to cherish them when they’re with me and to open my life to new ones when the time is right again. I hope you too will have a special 4-footed friend again soon.
Eric Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 9:17 amVisit Eric
My heartfelt condolences. My wife and I are dog lovers, and are owned by a 5-year-old Chocolate Lab. Our previous dog, a pound rescue who’d been with us for 14 years, was as much a part of our family as our kids. It truly broke our hearts when it was time for her to go.
Euthanizing a dog is a tough decision to make, but invariably it’s better for the dog than letting nature take its course.
Sue Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 9:21 amVisit Sue
I lost my amazing little yellow lab, Ruby, two years ago. She was a wild woman- frighteningly smart, unbelievably fast, so naughty sometimes it drove me nuts. But she was a great dog. I loved her and she loved me. She was only eight when she died- her front leg eatend away by cancer. It broke myheart.
It’s funny how the things that used to drive me nuts about her- the chewed-up edge of an Oriental carpet, the claw makes in the car upholstery- now serve as sweet reminders of her. I wouldn’t have missed a minute with Ruby for the world. I am convinced that when I die the first thing I’ll hear is her special “I’m so excited to see you!” bark.
Dogs are great. I’m so sorry you lost yours.
Viola Jaynes Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 9:30 amVisit Viola Jaynes
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Animals bring a special awareness to us and there is nothing like the unconditional love of a pet. Wishing you the best!
Truman Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 10:02 amVisit Truman
Hi, J. I went looking for Biblical reassurance about pets last night, and there is a very comforting thought: the Lord will renew His entire creation. Speaking through Isaiah, He says:
“The wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling together; and a little child will lead them.
The cow will feed with the bear, their young will lie down together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox.
The infant will play near the hole of the cobra, and the young child put his hand into the viper’s nest.
They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain, for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the LORD as the waters cover the sea.”
Joni Erikson Tada writes, “If God brings our pets back to life [in Heaven,] it wouldn’y surprise me. It would be just like Him. It would be totally in keeping with His generous character … Exorbitant. Excessive. Extravagant. in grace after grace. Of all the dazzling pleasures heaven will hold for us, the potential for seeing Scrappy would be pure whimsy –utterly, joyfully, surprisingly superfluous. It’s not that animals have souls or that God owes Scrappy anything, but that heaven is going to be a place that will refract abd reflect many in many ways as possible the goodness and joy of our great God who delights in lavishing love on His children…Who knows?”
Hope this is some comfort. I’ve said goodbye to many cold-nosers aleady, so I totally understand.
Dick Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 10:43 amVisit Dick
We, too, have had to euthanize a beloved dog. One of the things that helped me grieve our Jackie was to sit down and write every detail I could think of about her: her physical characteristics, her personality traits, her rituals…and all the rest. It was a helpful outlet for my sorrow in losing her. But writing that all down has had the added value of giving me something to pick up and read when I miss her. The paw prints in the carpeted stairs remained only a few days, but having the memories written down has helped us remember as much as possible about Jackie, the sweettest little red Doxie we ever knew.
benning Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 1:45 pmVisit benning
My sister and I picked a puppy from a litter of german shepherd/collie mix puppies. Our neighbors took a female and we took a male. We named him Toby; they named her Tippy. When I was eighteen Toby had reached a point where I had to lift his hindquarters so he could come in the back door. He was becoming mean - snapping at our grandmother if she got too close to his dinner dish, and other things - and it fell to me to take him to the vet to have him “put to sleep”. Spring of ‘74 it was, and Dad had died the previous September, so I was not in the best of shape emotionally, but trying to keep up a Manly facade.
I took Toby in the car to the Vet, and they led him off on his leash. He looked back at me, and I think he knew he was not coming back. I wish I had hugged him then, but I was trying to keep from turning into a weeping, little girlie-boy, so I said a quiet, “Goodbye, boy,” and watched him go.
When I got back in the car and headed home the radio was on, playing a Beatles tune - “Anytime At All” - and I wept like a baby. I can’t listen to that song to this day, 33 years later, without getting teary.
Our dogs are our brothers or our sisters. They’re kinda stupid, kinda silly, and they love us no matter what we’re like. They’re family.
When they’re gone we miss them, just like a human relation, forever. I miss Toby.
I feel for you, Jeanette.
~J~ Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 2:05 pmVisit ~J~
I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of support on the death of our precious Silky. It will take time to adjust but we know the right thing was done for her. It happened so quickly and she was slipping so fast we could see the change and I believe she was in the process of dying anyway. It was her time and we just made it easier for her.
Again, a big heartfelt thank you to all who have commented.
Obi’s Sister Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 2:54 pmVisit Obi’s Sister
Hang in there - remember the sweet memories.
daughter of patriots Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 3:53 pmVisit daughter of patriots
We lost a much beloved Lucy last summer. A chocolate lab, she was patient, kind, loving, obedient, truly a gift from the Lord. One of a kind. I feel your grief.
Shirley Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 4:28 pmVisit Shirley
J:
I’m truly sorry for your loss. I too am an animal lover.
Something you might enjoy reading is Mark Levin’s book entitled Rescuing Sprite. You can read more about it on his web site. Mark’s going to donate a portion of his proceeds
from the sale of the book to animal shelters.
God bless you and your family.
Pat Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 7:09 pmVisit Pat
Please accept my condolensces on Silky’s loss. When we lost a beloved pet my Mom used to say “It’s better to have loved and lost them than never to have had them at all.”
Pat
Renee P Says:
September 29th, 2007 at 10:20 pmVisit Renee P
There are three sets of ashes lovingly placed on top of my dresser: two were my hearthounds, Beowulf and Grendel, a pair of Irish Wolfhounds. The third was my daughter’s hearthound, Blade, a lovely shepherd/greyhound mix we adopted from the shelter.There are countless memories of furry angels that have graced my life over the years. When I think of my beloved companions I will think of your dear Silky too.
SonnyJim Says:
September 30th, 2007 at 10:45 pmVisit SonnyJim
My condolences for your loss. I’ve had a few pets come and go through my life. None touches my dog Bloody (no, no, he was not an exceptionally fierce character unless you were a raccoon; Capt Blood don’t you know, as in Errol Flynn). He was my constant companion in the woods, my heat-sharing partner in the cold winters of upstate New York and the one who was always there at the end of the driveway waiting for me to get home from school. He left us after I left home for the Marines. I still miss him thirty years later.
mary m Says:
October 1st, 2007 at 1:34 amVisit mary m
My heart breaks for you. We have lost two dogs in the not distant past–one to possible poisoning by someone, and my beloved Fluffy, due to old age. Fluffy died on the floor by my feet–not in any apparent pain, and it broke my heart. We adopted her from the Humane Society 15 years ago, and she was the sweetest, kindest, best friend one could ever want. It has been a few months now, and my daughter is giving me a Keeshond puppy for Christmas (although we will actually get her next week). God bless her–she is using her Christmas money from her grandparents and others for this gift, even though I tried to discourage her. I hope you are right, and I will someday be reunited with Fluffy, Gabby, Agnew, Softy, Taffy, Gynx, and Phoebe one day. They have lightened my load on this earth, dogs and cats alike. God has been very gracious to us, creating such wonderful creatures who can be our beloved companions.
God bless you, J, as you grieve the loss of your dear Silky. You are in my prayers.
~J~ Says:
October 1st, 2007 at 1:49 amVisit ~J~
Thank you, Mary M.
We had 3 dogs at the beginning of this year and now we have one.
I’ll be sixty years old in a few days and my husband is over sixty, so when this dog and our 17 year old cat go we don’t intend to replace them. I would hate to die and leave them behind.
We have gotten some guinea pigs for our grandchildren to have as pets at our house along with our dog and cat, but that’s probably the extent of our pet owning days.
When my husband’s father died he had a mean dog and he was old and not in good health. We tried to place him because we knew he wouldn’t be a fit in our home or with our children since they had children. We ended up having to have him put to sleep too. If he didn’t bite we would have kept him.