J's Cafe Nette

Archive for the ‘Grandparents’ Category

Our youngest grandchild turned 8 years old today, but that’s not what I want to tell you about him.

He’s a very smart little boy and as he told me last night when I asked if he would help my husband install some new gates, “I’m not just a kid. I’m a kid with a mind and I use it for reading, doing math, playing my games, but I’m not good at putting things together. I even have trouble putting legos together.”

I noticed a little later on that he had a sticker on his shirt that he had received in school. It said, I’m thankful for and the children had to write in the things they were thankful for.

Unlike some of his classmates who said they were thankful for the parents, dogs, ice cream etc., my grandson wrote on his that he is thankful for “God, Heaven and Jesus”. Seems he has his eye on the prize and not the little things of the world.

He often talks to me about spiritual things and last week I told him he was almost 8 years old and in ten years he’d be 18 years old and a man. I said I hoped he still came to visit us and help us to go places we might not be able to navigate then. His response was that he thought by the time he was 18 we’d be dead! I told him I hoped not, but it shows the depth of his thoughts.

He’s definitely his grandfather’s boy and worships my husband. The feeling is reciprocated. My husband calls him “my boy” and he has me wrapped around his finger so tightly I find it hard to tell him no to things such as spending an extra night here.

I’m as close to his sister and she to me as my husband and grandson are with each other.

Lest you think we are playing favorites we stay in touch with our son’s children in Texas and give them advice when they ask or just praise them for their accomplishments with a little bribe for getting good grades.

If I had known how wonderful grandchildren are I would have had them first. I know that’s impossible, but the joys of being a grandparent surpass anything I have known other than falling in love, getting married, seeing my own children for the first time, and being proud of their accomplishments.

It seems we have more time, patience and a softer heart with these four children and they will always be my little babies as long as I live.

Happy birthday, Ry-Ry! You said it feels really, really good to be 8. I know whatever you do in life you will never disappoint us.

We love you all, Patrick, Kelsey, Ashley and Ryan.

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Very vivid in my memory is the loss of my grandparents.

When we lost my Dad’s father we were stationed in Hawaii and only he could return for the services.

I remember my paternal grandfather as a kind man who worked hard during very tough times to support a wife and 7 children. His illness and death left a profound mark on my life as it was my first experience in the loss of a loved one.

Then the loss of my paternal grandmother at a time when we spent most days concerned with the well being of Dad who was serving in Vietnam.

Grandma was a stern woman who did the best she could to raise those 6 girls and 1 boy. She was not warm and funny like my grandfather but always made certain if you visited that all your basic necessities were met. None of her (sometimes hard to take) personality traits changed the loss we felt at her unexpected death.

My maternal grandparents were a very important part of my life growing up. They visited us whenever they could no matter where we were stationed. I never really had a “home” as others know one, but when on leave my folks would say “we’re going home” I always knew that meant to visit Grandma and Grandpa.

Mom too came from a large family and when we would arrive “home” all were there to greet us..aunts, uncles, cousins friends. It was always quite a reunion and yes that’s what it was as there were times the absences were lengthy.

I am the oldest grandchild and my grandmother would inevitably, within an hour of arrival instruct me to “take the younger ones for a walk to see the reindeer” so final preparations could be made for the meal we would all share. Those plastic reindeer, those bib aprons, a glider swing and the amazing smells and sounds of their home all formed powerful memories.

Learning to iron was not a chore because Grandma taught me. Nothing was ever wasted..it was eaten, used or shared. Church on Sunday was expected and no argument for ever offered as everyone knew it would be promptly rejected.

My grandparents, with whom I could not share anywhere near as much time as I would have liked formed many of the values I carry today. Their love was unconditional and the respect they commanded was well deserved. Losing them was one of the most difficult and heartbreaking experiences of my life.

I cannot imagine as any of my grandparents were lying gravely ill that I would do this:

I just know I couldn’t!

Maybe this is the way the Senator deals with grief and for that I will pass no judgment. But, once again, IMHO this shows that Barack Obama puts himself first, even over and above the woman who raised and nurtured him.

The link above the video has more not only about the Senator’s grandmother but also his treatment of his own mother. Sometimes it’s not words but actions which speaks volumes about the character of a man or woman. This, I believe is one of those times.

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While the video quality may be a bit rough, (no doubt due to age), the message from Bill Gaither to his grandson is pricless in this performance of “We’ll Be There.”

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